This week, I headed back to school for some staff development training and we closed the last day with a “ceremony” where everyone committed to our school and made a promise to focus on something (generally a weakness) for the school year. Everyone said their intention out loud and co-workers would respond with “I will help you!” to show their support in helping each other to be their best. My intention was that I promised to let things roll off my back when it comes to things that I can’t control. I really honestly just wrote that down in a quick minute, not really thinking that that it really is applicable to all parts of my life. It’s a huge cause of stress and yuckiness for me. I do not let things roll of my back ever. Not at home, not at work, not in my running. That’s not good and that’s eye opening.
Being a very organized, Type A person, it’s a daily struggle to let things go and to just let it be. I have to know the why?, the what?, and the now what? of every situation and it eats at me. I’m not sure how to tackle letting it go and letting more things roll of my back, but I’m willing to try. I’m willing to not only make the commitment for my school life, but I’m willing to adopt it to my home, social and running life. So here’s my plan (see totally Type A!):
1. I’m going to recognize that I’m not letting it roll of my back and stop the thought process that usually happens next. I’m going to say to myself, “This is out of my control. Why stress it?” and dismiss the thought.
2. If I can’t dismiss it the thought and I find it creeping back in, I’m going to write it down as a way of physically removing it. By writing it down or putting it “out of my mind”, I can look at it later to really determine if it is in fact something that I need to deal with to let it go. Maybe it’s not something that I can just let roll of my back?
3. Get help from family and friends. I will ask Nick or other friends or family for their opinions often if I’m overreacting or if it’s something that I need to deal with or do I just let it go? 99% of the time, by just talking about it, I’ve let it go and I can move on. Sometimes, I still have to kind of talk myself into knowing to let go. I have the MOST patient friends and family. I know that I can wear them out, but they love me despite my flaws. I owe them the world!
4. If even after all that and I can’t let it roll, then I’m just going to sit quietly and reflect on the complete opposite. What is worth to let it go, what do I gain by letting it go, why shouldn’t I let it creep back in and remind myself of the intention that I made and start the process all over again until it’s finally a fleeting thought or feeling.
The most important piece of this whole process is the support. Knowing that someone else has my back to help me to become the best person I can be. I need their help. I can’t do this by myself because at this point, I don’t trust myself enough to do this alone. I know that I have people who will be there to help and that makes me willing to try, to fail and to learn and succeed at doing this. I’m excited about the idea of what this will mean for me and my life! That excitement is enough for me to give it a shot.(picture of a magnet I saw in a store a year ago)
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